The Importance of Soft Skills Training

Like in so many areas in business, lots of people lack Soft Skills. Business is about people. It is about communication, relationships and about presenting yourself, your company and your ideas in the most positive and effective way. Many business people like to think that success is based on logical, rational thoughts and acts, but the human element should never be ignored. Which is why a strong soft skills set is vitally imperative.

Be Gentle

6 soft skills for every hard-nosed professional

Behavioral training experts say there are several soft skills are required in these circumstances. Some of them include:

1. Interpersonal skills

2. Team spirit

3. Social grace

4. Business etiquette

5. Negotiation skills

6. Behavioral traits such as attitude, motivation and time management

Do you have these? If your answer is yes, great for you!

But if your answer is no, then you know it is time to approach a professional Training Consultant.

Soft skills training can make the difference between closing the deal and losing it, creating a organized, efficient team or a malfunctioning one, getting that promotion you strive for or missing out. Great people skills give you a competitive edge, helping you to create positive relationships. If you acquire these you can give and get more from the people around you, both internally and externally.

Don't underestimate the Value of Soft Skill

Soft skills training encompass a whole range of skills, including assertiveness, influencing and persuading, negotiating, presenting and public speaking, networking and managing a team. Overall, it is about gaining a better understanding of the ways people think and behave and presenting yourself and your ideas in a way that will have the best impact.

This type of training not just important for managers, but for everybody who interacts with other people as part of their job or  in their private life - anyone with friends, customers or clients, anyone who commissions work from suppliers and anyone who works as part of a team or simply wants to lead a more productive and fruitful life..

For many professions, the importance of soft skills is obvious - for example sales people, those in customer service, politicians and journalists. For many of the more process driven and technical professions however, such as accounting or IT, soft skills training can often be forgotten or given less focus. Even in this type of business, though, employees need to interact when managing staff, running meetings or simplifying complex ideas or processes for clients and coworkers. 

Skills have to be built!

For some people, these skills come naturally, while others need to work harder at them. Some personality types are filled with horror at the thought of public speaking and networking with strangers, while others flourish in this type of situation. Some find it difficult to be assertive and a strong negotiator, others can be too aggressive. Everyone will find that they can benefit from learning new techniques and obtaining objective advice and feedback.

Soft skills training should be tailored to take into account the experience, situation and personality of the delegates. A pre-course questionnaire can help to establish these things and a good trainer will adapt their approach accordingly. A successful training session will also get the balance between theory on the one hand and practice and interaction on the other. After all, it's all about how you work with people and you can't learn that just by listening.

The Importance of Personality Development

We at ASO Terra Lingua are currently conducting various Personalty Development Workshops for Colleges and Corporations. One of the first questions which comes up is always: "What is Personalty exactly?". So we took this up and defined this broad subject in the following short article:

What is Personality?

Personality Defined

Are you looking to define personality traits? Personality is a pretty important word in the English language. If you ask someone why they chose their spouse or what the most important quality the look for in a friend is, most people many people will say “a good personality.” But, what does that mean? The truth is, the meaning of a “good personality” is different for everyone. Some people like quiet people, while others want to hang out with the loudest person in the room. Some value humor, while others praise intellect. And, of course, many people can have both intellect and humor and these things are both part of their personalities. These different factors, in fact, are considered to be personality traits.

Stick out!

What makes a winning Personality? How can I develop my Personality?

Over seventy years ago, Dale Carnegie wrote the classic, How to Win Friends and Influence People. It's all about human relationships and how to be more effective when dealing with people. It's a great book but it's not very practical. Who can walk around, meet people and try to recall some fifty different rules that should be applied to present a winning personality? What is needed is a short, concise and to the point formula, something that will encompass all of what Carnegie and others had to say on the subject. 

There are two basic elements upon which a winning personality is based. The first is caring about people and the other one is a close cousin of caring which is, making people feel good about themselves. Sounds easy enough but in actuality, it's not that simple.

First, we cannot fake about caring. Either we do or we don't. Any attempt to fake caring is the perfect recipe for disaster. People will see right through it and will be put off by the charade. There is nothing as toxic as a lack of sincerity in human relation so it is to be avoided at all cost.

Caring about people is something that can be learned and it is not all that difficult. We simply have to remind ourselves how important people are. The people that we come in contact with, either directly or indirectly, can make us or break us. They literally hold our future in their hands. They are the ones who will either give us what we want or walk away from us.

If we care about people, they will care about us. There is something contagious about caring. It is the highest compliment that we can give to someone. It means, you are someone important, you matter. It is respect and acceptance all rolled into one. It is the golden rule at its finest. When we care about someone, we are treating that person the way that we would like to be treated. It's an irresistible magnet.

The next elements needed to have a winning personality are to make people feel good about themselves. One of the primordial human needs is significance. We all need to feel that we are important, that we matter. 

Making someone feeling good about themselves is one of the most effective way to fill that need.

Again, making people feel good about themselves cannot be faked. If we believe that they are worthy, the message will come through naturally. That message will be expressed in body language, in the words that we used and in the tone that we use to express those words. Our deepest feelings have a way of expressing themselves that cannot be denied, missed or misunderstood. The heart speaks louder and more clearly than words ever could.

Thumbs Up!

So, if you want to have a winning personality, truly care about people, make them feel good about themselves... and they'll think the world of you. 

That's what a winning personality is all about!

How to improve your Body Language

Body Language Training

ASO Terra Lingua has seen the need for Body Language Training, especially here in India. Body language is an important part of communication which constitutes of 50% or more of what we are communicating. If you wish to communicate well, then it makes sense to understand how you can (and cannot) use your body to say what you mean. Improving your body language can make a big difference in your people skills, attractiveness and general mood.

There is no specific advice on how to use your body language. What you do might be interpreted in several ways, depending on the setting and who you are talking to. You’ll probably want to use your body language differently when talking to your boss compared to when you talk to a girl/guy you’re interested in. These are some common interpretations of body language and often more effective ways to communicate with your body.

Hand Gestures

First, to change your body language you must be aware of your body language. Notice how you sit, how you stand, how you use your hands and legs, what you do while talking to someone.

You might want to practice in front of a mirror. Yeah, it might seem silly but no one is watching you. This will give you good feedback on how you look to other people and give you an opportunity to practise a bit before going out into the world.

Another tip is to close your eyes and visualize how you would stand and sit to feel confident, open and relaxed or whatever you want to communicate. See yourself move like that version of yourself. Then try it out.

You might also want observe friends, role models, movie stars or other people you think has good body language. Observe what they do and you don’t. Take bits and pieces you like from different people. Try using what you can learn from them.

Some of these tips might seem like you are faking something. But fake it till you make it is a useful way to learn something new. And remember, feelings work backwards too. If you smile a bit more you will feel happier. If you sit up straight you will feel more energetic and in control. If you slow down your movements you’ll feel calmer. Your feelings will actually reinforce your new behaviours and feelings of weirdness will dissipate.

In the beginning easy it’s to exaggerate your body language. You might sit with your legs almost ridiculously far apart or sit up straight in a tense pose all the time. That’s ok. And people aren’t looking as much as you think; they are worrying about their own problems. Just play around a bit, practice and monitor yourself to find a comfortable balance.

1. Don’t cross your arms or legs – You have probably already heard you shouldn’t cross your arms as it might make you seem defensive or guarded. This goes for your legs too. Keep your arms and legs open.

2. Have eye contact, but don’t stare – If there are several people you are talking to, give them all some eye contact to create a better connection and see if they are listening. Keeping too much eye-contact might creep people out. Giving no eye-contact might make you seem insecure. If you are not used to keeping eye-contact it might feel a little hard or scary in the beginning but keep working on it and you’ll get used to it.

3. Don’t be afraid to take up some space – Taking up space by for example sitting or standing with your legs apart a bit signals self-confidence and that you are comfortable in your own skin.

4. Relax your shoulders – When you feel tense it’s easily winds up as tension in your shoulders. They might move up and forward a bit. Try to relax. Try to loosen up by shaking the shoulders a bit and move them back slightly.

5. Nod when they are talking – nod once in a while to signal that you are listening. But don’t overdo it and peck like Woody Woodpecker.

6. Don’t slouch; sit up straight – but in a relaxed way, not in a too tense manner.

7. Lean, but not too much – If you want to show that you are interested in what someone is saying, lean toward the person talking. If you want to show that you’re confident in yourself and relaxed lean back a bit. But don’t lean in too much or you might seem needy and desperate for some approval. Or lean back too much or you might seem arrogant and distant.

8. Smile and laugh – lighten up, don’t take yourself too seriously. Relax a bit, smile and laugh when someone says something funny. People will be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you seem to be a positive person. But don’t be the first to laugh at your own jokes, it makes you seem nervous and needy. Smile when you are introduced to someone but don’t keep a smile plastered on your face, you’ll seem insincere.

9. Don’t touch your face – it might make you seem nervous and can be distracting for the listeners or the people in the conversation.

10. Keep your head up – Don’t keep your eyes on the ground, it might make you seem insecure and a bit lost. Keep your head up straight and your eyes towards the horizon.

11. Slow down a bit – this goes for many things. Walking slower not only makes you seem more calm and confident, it will also make you feel less stressed. If someone addresses you, don’t snap you’re neck in their direction, turn it a bit more slowly instead.

12. Don’t fidget – try to avoid, phase out or transform fidgety movement and nervous ticks such as shaking your leg or tapping your fingers against the table rapidly. You’ll seem nervous and fidgeting can be a distracting when you try to get something across. De-clutter your movements if you are all over the place. Try to relax, slow down and focus your movements.

13. Use your hands more confidently – instead of fidgeting with your hands and scratching your face use them to communicate what you are trying to say. Use your hands to describe something or to add weight to a point you are trying to make. But don’t use them to much or it might become distracting. And don’t let your hands flail around, use them with some control.

14. Lower your drink – don’t hold your drink in front of your chest. In fact, don’t hold anything in front of your heart as it will make you seem guarded and distant. Lower it and hold it beside your leg instead.

15. Realise where you spine ends – many people (including me until recently) might sit or stand with a straight back in a good posture. However, they might think that the spine ends where the neck begins and therefore crane the neck forward in a Montgomery Burns-pose. Your spine ends in the back of your head. Keep your whole spine straight and aligned for better posture.

16. Don’t stand too close –one of the things that we have to keep in mind is that everybody gets weirded out by a close-talker. Let people have their personal space, don’t invade it.

17. Mirror – Often when you get along with a person, when the two of you get a good connection, you will start to mirror each other unconsciously. That means that you mirror the other person’s body language a bit. To make the connection better you can try a bit of proactive mirroring. If he leans forward, you might lean forward. If she holds her hands on her thighs, you might do the same. But don’t react instantly and don’t mirror every change in body language.

18. Keep a good attitude – last but not least, keep a positive, open and relaxed attitude. How you feel will come through in your body language and can make a major difference.

You can change your body language but as all new habits it takes a while. Especially things like keeping you head up might take time to correct if you have spent thousands of days looking at your feet. And if you try and change to many things at once it might become confusing and feel overwhelming.

Take a couple of these body language bits to work or school every day for three to four weeks. By then they should have developed into new habits and something you’ll do without even thinking about it. If not, keep on until it sticks. Then take another couple of things you’d like to change and work on them.

If you want to know more about Body Language or book one of our top-notch workshops, please get in touch with us